I came to a horrifying realization today. When in a public restroom, sandals are the absolute worst thing you can wear. It turns an otherwise routine part of the day into a carnival of potential horrors. You become hyper-vigilant, silently and frantically praying that the tubby child standing next to you at the urinal doesn't miss and splash your exposed toes, or that you don't slip off that narrow foam platform masquerading as footwear and make contact with the floor. Granted, feet are generally dirty and gross, but they are sterile as new surgical tools when compared to the floor of the restroom of the dollar theater.